(Maitland) Hey hey, happy man, smiling as he leaves the book store Carrying his carrier bags all bulging wide Such a lucky man, such a lot to line your shelves with Starts to hurry so that he can get Inside Each book it overflows with violent murder That he can read about in bed when he gets home It chills him to the bone chorus 'cos he loves Jeffrey Dahmer And he loves the son of Sam And he loves reciting segments From 'The Silence Of The Lambs' And he worships Charlie Manson Wishes he was Eddie Gein He's a member of the fan club For the criminally insane Hey hey, smiling man, smiling, leaves the local art house - Just seen 'Henry' for the thousandth time Don't walk - he skips along, calls in at the old newsagent To see if his magazine's come in on time It has a label screaming: ADULTS ONLY And lovingly details all the latest gruesome crimes He laps up every line chorus Hey hey, happy man, smiling while his aunt & uncle have Fun force-feeding him with tea and cakes Glibly sipping sits, mind-undressing antique figures Briskly stiffens when he hears his aunt y say: "well, ain't that awful about that girl being murdered" His uncle nods and bellows: "string the bastards up !!" Our man just grips his cup chorus
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